Augusta County: Ella [unknown] to Mary Anna Sibert, August 24,
1857
Summary:
Ella writes Mary about mutual friends, courtship rumors, and plans for visiting. She also
confides her feelings of melancholy and longings for heaven.
August, 24th, 1857
Poplar Hill
My Dear Friend Mary
I cannot see why I should set and stitch away all day and neglect my good friends all of them, when I have no little ones and indeed yet without the first incumberance a husband glad to still to give you this bit of information. I say I cannot see why I should be so energetic and economizing every moment of my time to make a fortune when I can take nothing with me, and have enough to do [illeg.] whilst here. With this consideration the sewing is laid aside and I resume this pen once more
I have been doing but little writing of late and realy It is a taske for me now. "Procrastination is my besetting sin" Before I proceed to [illeg.], I must thank you for your good and highly prized communication which reached me this day week, and offer and apology for my remissness.
I did not think you insane when you said you expected a reply to the note you sent me by Josie I undoubtedly would have looked, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." --This maxim I endeavor to keep indelibly stamped upon my memory.---------
The reason Mary Anna I did not answer that note was I heard that you intend sending me a
letter which kept me looking for weeks, "Long looked for come at last"
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Josie is not
at home this afternoon, gone to that "Twisted Gap" Do you rember how you would repeat this
after me when here? Oh! those days I think of them often and live them over in imagination. The
Pic-nic the strange and quickly manufactured horse which is this moment in demand for I am
litterly
out of snuff and know not where to go or what to do. "Mary Anna let us have a Dipp"
"Well" and here would come the old thing slipping up to the tub, what
pleasure that was! how strange this is [unclear: corenlated] to strengthen the links of
affection and it is evidently the case.
Yes Mary I love you very much a great deel more you have any Idea, think of you often and wish so much to be with you, and do Mary intend spending a good long time with you all when I go down again. I have much to write you, and Oh! that we could speak face to face. I am in truth almost dead with the blues this evening and I cant tell why it is--------I am looking this evening for a letter from you know who I love best of all, Hilder and this will cheer my drooping spirits-----
Here comes Joe creeping along just as If I was'nt all anxiety for
this letter. I am revived enough from a terrible shock, and take this pen up again, "Where is
my Hilder letter Joe" "None come" My soul, almost swearing, "but here
is one from Fannie it will fill the disappointment" Not so at all, It is a poor
substitute. Well well one trouble never comes alone. I am sad oh!
worse than
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ever no letter from Hilder, can It be he has forgotten me? Am I, one who loves fondly, but forgotten
and forsaken by him? Oh! no this cannot be! How reluctantly hope
leaves the human heart. Dont think gone entirely deranged.
Mary this brings to mind a mistake that you are labouring under. I will endeavor to remove any person or persons that informed you that I had captivated Mr Clippinger are grandly mistaken. Pledge you my word I have not seen Mr C for five weeks This looks much like captivation. If you are a friend of mine you will set your foot righ on this now You believe me I know. I think I am scandalized most shamefully, Tho Mary none of this I entend for you
Mr R your friend and minister preached for us on last Sabbath week and did well. He did not condescend to call and see us "Amen.
Our quarterly meetint commences the 5th of September Saturday week. In few words let me say I will look for you and Kennie both or one anyway to attend it Come do I will look - Dont disappoint us - Let me hear by mail whether you will come, nothing to prevent one If not both.
I was in Solon one day and Sunday as it was If I had not had company and the children to take
care of I would have gone over tho looked for you and that good
sister of yours every moment, and was obliged to return without one look at you. I was sorey and disappointed
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The evening has passed and night is here. Josie, Willie, and myself are seated around this table. Josie writing to her friend Mr Ewan, Willie reading and I am going to ty and finish this imperfect letter --I had to take a good cry this eveing and now my heart feels releaved. Is there any one like me? "Even in laughter the heart is sorrowful; and the end of that mirth is heaviness"--I laugh many times when I feel like crying, "every heart knoweth his own bitterness"--For every smile a tear with me. sometimes I wish I could never laugh I have naturally a desponding disposition and I know I cherish this feeling too much, and feel it's no use to try to change nature. I wish I was in Heaven, I long to leave this world. I feel less attached to the world and worldly pleasures every day - I must make and effort to be a better girls You agree with me dont you? We have been attending a meeting for two days, only a mile from here. I think much good will be done. I did not feel like going out to night I wish you were here to night I feel as If a little chat with you would do me good
How is Mattie and all? When you see her tell her the dress is done, and I come across some more of dear little Idea's clothes since she left will send them all [unclear: home] the first opportunity. my love to her and say to her that I still feel indignant towards her for taking my little girl from me. I had to cry after Idea left when twilight come something was missing and I had no little dear pet to undress rock and sing to sleep.
Last though not least, you say there is some talk of a company going to Weyers Cave. I will certainly accompany you, If you will let me know in time, and wish my company. Dont do as we all did about the Bridge trip fall through. Persevere to the end I am so anxious, and have said positively I will never axceed to any arrangements they see proper to make for another trip any where. Just let me know in time and I'll go. In three weeks from now will suit me well and a pleasant time for a trip -- That is If this time will suit you all - our meeting will be the present and only obstacle with me.
Cousin Lavenia sends much love to you she frequently speaks of you affectionately. My love to your Ma, Pa Kennie Ella and all the rest. Willie has this moment left the room walking backwards telling me to say this that and the other for him, sends his love and respects to [illeg.], and positively declares you shall never complain of his passing without calling If he is in the Steam cars .
I must stop for want of space. I am like the boy, "when I get to going I cant stop"---------Write soon as you can tell me all, Particularly all about the trip when you think you will go and If you and Kennie will come to the meeting. come do, Kiss dear Ken for me I love her very much and your Ma too. Ma seems to think the Music Box will become rusted If you dont soon return to P. H. I often look at it and laugh and think of poor Mary Anna--
With affection fond and true
Ella
Good morning Dear Mary Goodness Isnt it cold A fire I would have If it
did'nt look so bad Though a lovely day, melancholy season is coming -- I am feeling quite
badly This morning can hardly sit up, enjoying splendid
music, Truly yours Ella
Has your Ma gone to Page yet? I had
intend sending you the pattern by Mattie and forgot it. Do you Dip yet? I do and got out the
good stuff this evening and Joe and I both are looking Mad Let no
one read my letters
mind - If you do I wont write to you any more Good bye Aff..ly
Ella
